He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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