best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
