It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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