idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
