if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
