Kiss
Puke
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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