she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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