What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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