I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
