We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
