just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
