im having a threesome with these popsicles
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
