everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Randomize
