8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Blood and glitter go together right?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize