sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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