I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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