is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
