what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
