It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize