I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
