Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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