My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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