He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
