real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize