please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
