I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Man, jail baloney is awful.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize