I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize