My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
