Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
