He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
