I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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