would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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