everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
