you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
