Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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