no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
