so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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