Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize
