Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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