the new term for farting is butt boxing.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
The struggles of a small town man whore
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize