So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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