haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Randomize