"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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