We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I am available for nakedness
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize
