What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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