its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
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