GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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