I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
