He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I'm experimenting with sincerity
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
