just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
