No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
